Today at church the lesson was on the purpose of trials. Trials are not about the answer at the end, but about us becoming more like Christ. When we reach that point where we say “God gives and God can take away.” As Job once did. Or like Abraham when he said “God can bring my son life again” when God had asked him to sacrifice Isaac. It’s a point we reach where we truly give ourselves to God. In the Business of Being Born the midwife in the film talks about her giving birth. It was when she finally gave into her body and what it was telling her to do. When she finally let go. That is when her baby arrived. I too have had a similar experience while giving birth. I thought it wouldn’t take long, since my last birth hadn’t. I thought it would be easier. I was wrong. Looking back I realize how God showed me how to let go. It wasn’t easy. It took defeat. Labor lasted a lot longer than I had imagined it would. It was intense. I was scared and wanted to be done. Thoughts raced through my mind from time to time. If I’d gotten a c-section, I wouldn’t be in so much pain and discomfort. I’d already be holding my baby. I wouldn’t be worried about them and why it was taking so long for their arrival. I considered giving up. I was too weak, too tired, to continue. I almost cried many times, because I felt like such a failure. It was when I finally said to myself, I can’t do this without God, that my baby finally arrived. I cried out, “God help me!” as I thought, “Without you I just might die.” My baby was born. All the fear was gone. This precious life in my arms, melted away everything, and filled me with the love of God. I learned that I am a fighter as much as a lover, if it's for the right cause. Jesus was also a fighter and a lover.