Thursday, July 25, 2013

Growing Spiritualy

It never ceases to amaze me, how faithful God is. Today was a rough day. It was one of "those" days. It left me feeling inadequate as a mother, frustrated with my parenting and with my children, and wondering "What do I do? How can things change?"

I will admit, I'm a fan of the Duggars. I think they are an inspiration and willing tools for God. The kids and I watched a couple of their episodes last night after church. I'm thankful I did. One episode showed their son Jackson climbing on things, jumping off things, and well, being a boy! Earlier that day, I had dealt with my sons running around chasing each other and wrestling in a small crowded room as I tried to register my oldest blessing for the upcoming soccer season. I could feel the eyes upon me and could only imagine what people were thinking. As I stood in line thinking about this, God spoke to my heart and reminded me, at home this stuff is funny. Maybe it wasn't the best location for their shenanigans, but the fact is they were doing what little boys do. I could worry about what everyone else might be thinking, or I could lighten up and praise God that I'm so richly blessed, knowing that later it would be funny to look back on.

This morning however, was just not a happy one. Remembering to "lighten up" fell off my radar as I went through the same old teeth pulling with my girls about being active team players in the house keeping. It got worse when my younger daughter turned in her overdue book report and I read it. It was pretty much exactly what the back of the book said with a few things changed here and there... In some ways, I can look on that now and find humor in it and even a sense of pride. Not over the fact that she lied, but over her cleverness. Unfortunately for her, I know that trick and she now has to redo her book report.

I hate fighting with my kids and feel like it has become a theme in our home, especially with the girls. I dread the day the hormones really start to fly around this house.

In my discouragement, I wondered what do the Duggars do to make it all work. Is there hope for my family, or did the past mistakes my husband and I have made ruin everything? I went to their website and God showed me what I've been looking for. Answers to the "What do I do? How can things change." and He even opened my eyes to show me, I do more than I realize.

I hope that I can take what He has revealed to my heart and allow it to bear fruit. My first goal in making this change is to learn how to praise my children 10 times more than I correct them. I know I praise my kids some, but I do way more correcting and yelling, nagging, and complaining than I do praising.

I am in awe at how excited God is to watch me grow and to be what grows me. Along with these things, God also answered the question in my heart. "Why is it that I can't go a week outside of his word or church, without it feeling like I've grown so distant from Him." The answer? When we take our focus off of what is eternal, we're left focusing on the things of this world. When the things of the world become our priority, we turn from God, towards our carnal desires and our flesh grows stronger while our spirit grows weaker. The wolf within us that we feed will be the wolf that thrives. (paraphrased of course)

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