Ninety Percent

I have been overwhelmed by all my wants, desires, feelings, etc... for a very long time. I've been praying and asking God what should I be doing, while at the same time pursuing what I thought I should be doing.

This Sunday, as I sat in the pew, after service, God answered me, yet again. Just as He had to do with our forefathers (and mothers), He has had to remind me over and over, because I'm dreadful at remembering. Speaking through a wonderful woman, He spoke to my heart. She told me of how she once read, in a book, (this is the not exactly version) that we should take our top 3 priorities and dedicate 90% of our focus to them. Whatever falls to the wayside falls, as long as those 3 things are strong.

It's easy to say that my top 3 priorities in life are 1. God 2. Family 3. My homestead. However, when assessing my priorities and focus, I had to admit, they are the things that go to the wayside most often. Some may ask how that is possible, when I give so much of my time to fellowship, homeschooling my children, and being at home. The answer, my body may be here, but my heart and mind have wandered.

It is my goal and my hope that, as I continue to grow in this life, that my yeses will be yeses and my nos nos. That I will be better and better at letting go and letting things fall to the wayside, in order to not sacrifice my top 3 priorities. For what good is it, if I gain the whole world, but have lost these things? I've allowed myself to be distracted by lesser things and have missed out on enough already. I see that this is an opportunity for me to learn to follow through and give all I am and all I have, and then some, if I'm willing to do the hard work.

Yesterday, I set my phone aside, and I watched through out the day as my boys wrestled and played. I watched as Blessing #5 chased our chickens around, trying to pet them. Then I saw Blessings #3 and 4 try to protect #5 from our turkey toms before climbing the gate into our chicken, run leaving Blessing #5 crying on the outside. I took pictures of the flour disaster they left all over my kitchen last night.

Today I spent the day doing my best to give my focus to them.We picked mulberries together, collecting just over a small bucket full. Blessing #5, wearing just his birthday suit, became covered in mulberry juice stains, and possibly poison ivy. Blessing #4 was eating berries here and there and licking juice, from smashed berries, off of his fingers. As I worked on making mulberry leather, I could hear them, and glance over to see them, playing with their legos together or wrestling around and building forts out of cushions, blankets, and chairs.

Though, I got frustrated with the messes they made, I can look back on today, on yesterday, as successes. Successes in focusing on my top priorities.

It doesn't matter if I have to say no to others, or have to wait to do something I really *want* to do, or get something I really *want* to have, etc... what matters is how I invest in my relationship with God, my connections with my family, and the care and appreciation of everything God has given me stewardship over.