Just a Breath

Today as I was doing my daily reading, I noticed a theme starting. I seem to be coming across things that remind me that our days are numbered. That we are but a breath in God's time line. What am I doing with my day, my life? That is the question. Am I in alignment with God or with the world and the things of it? A body out of alignment is more prone to health and mental issues, as well as pain and discomfort, and a lower quality of life.

Yesterday, I spent the afternoon caught up in planning out an educational map for each of my girls and for the rest of my children. This is good in the sense that it gives us an idea of what still needs to be achieved to reach their goals and to give me some perspective. At the same time, I can plan all I want, but plans change and get "thrown off". I could've spent the afternoon more wisely. Thankfully, God gave me a second chance last night. Normally after church, I get the kids in their pajamas and send them to bed, because I'm exhausted and want to go to bed too. Last night, my oldest stayed home sick. While I was gone she sent me messages over and over telling me she missed me and couldn't wait til we got home so she could snuggle with me. When we got home, I let the kids get a snack, and then it was pajama time. Instead of sending them off to their own beds, I gathered them in to mine and read 2 chapters of Anne of Green Gables to them. I don't read to them nearly as often as I should. I don't use my time wisely, very often. Too many days end with me wondering, "What did I do that was worth this day of my life?", "How did I impact my kids today?" Sometimes I feel in a rut or like I'm just going through the motions of the day, caught up and overwhelmed by my "to do" list, that I never actually get finished, that everything that really matters gets put on the back burner. I know this is extremely common. I wonder often, "What is the purpose behind what I'm teaching them, how I'm raising them, and the life that we live?"

 I want this breath to matter, to be worth the time God gave it.